For guys, about pants ...

La Planchadora has a series of posts titled "attacked by a wild animal" showing all sorts of outfits women wear (but shouldn't) at milongas.

I felt men were shortchanged here, as they didn't get any useful advice, how should we know what to wear if no one tells us? Some may think "uhh, common sense?" I'm sorry to say, common sense passed away a while ago, so don't count on it.

So I took it upon myself to make a contribution (as modest as it may be) to the well being of the aesthetics of the milongas and the world in general.

Without further ado, the subject today is pants. Some think this is a trivial subject that doesn't require any thought. I mean, all pants are the same, right? You put them on, one leg at a time (or if you're really good, both at the same time) and you're all set. Right?

Wrong. First we all know that fashion goes in cycles, so what's hot today might be ridiculous tomorrow. Although, some people CAN pull off cool looks with outdated pieces. But here are a few "looks" you want to avoid at ALL COSTS.

There was NEVER a moment in the history of the world when the following looks were hot.

The "grandpa look". Trust me, no one EVER thought that was hot. EVER. Even if you are a grandpa, please, please don't sport this look. Here's a hint, keep the waist line of your pants WELL BELOW your belly button.




The "muffin top" look. For the love of god, get pants your size. The fact that you can still close the buttons on your pants doesn't mean it's your size (by the way, that's true for girls too as one can see in the picture).


The "I'm wearing my daddy's pants" look. If you are over 10, it is not cute. If you lost weight, buy new pants!





The "after flood" look. Umm, don't do it!






Looks that might've been hot at one point or they look hot on some celebrities, but you wearing them right now makes people laugh behind your back.

The "disco" look. I have to be clear about this, some flared pants are cool if you can pull it off (if you ever saw me recently at tango events, you know that's possible), but not all flared pants are the same and the 80s look (skinny on top with bell bottoms) are particularily difficult to make look cool (for guys that is).



The "rock star" look. Leather pants? Ohh, once again, rock stars might pull it off and so other other people with a flair for coolness, but trust me, if no one ever complimented you on your outfits before you bought the leather pants, they are definitely not going to compliment you now.


Well, I hope this helps! By the way, please show your support for this by posting some comments, so the offenders don't think it's the lone opinion of a crazy european ....